Monday, January 21, 2008
Oy. Can Episcopalians Say That?
Okay. You know how they say when one door closes, a window opens? Well, what if you aren't sure you want it to open? I decided to take a little break from Bachelor #2. So, I hear from someone today, an ex. And I guess, I'm going to have to give him the name of Bachelor #3, even though he was before Bachelor #1. Way too confusing. Anyway, I have dated lots and lots of guys my last few years of being single, and cared about 3. And they are all still in my life, in one way or another. Bachelor #3 broke. my. heart. I have to write it like that, because that's the way it felt. He was the first 'boyfriend' after my divorce. Why couldn't this have happened 4 years ago? But, somehow, somewa-ay, we have managed to stay friends, and he is my biggest fan. Hands down. He has now finally said, not beating around the bush, that he made a huge mistake letting me go, and would not do it again. I am floored. Now could be the perfect time to try again, but it took me so long to get over him. And, now, I'm actually afraid I would break HIS heart, because I really do want to be with Bachelor #2. Damn. So, what am I doing? Figuratively, barricading the open window. Literally, high-tailing my happy ass to Las Vegas and running away. 3 or 4 days of debauchery ought to clear my head.