You, Me and Jolie

I just read an article detailing the similarities between hottie Tom Brady and nottie Derek Jeter. (Those views are strictly the views of Bringing Foxy Back. It's my blog, so there.) Naturally, it made me think of the many similarities between myself and Angelina Jolie. Come on, admit it. You think about them all the time. Here goes:

Angie: Humanitarian and activist
Me: Human and active

Angie: The most talked about lips of her generation
Me: Even though I have the biggest lips of anyone I know outside of a Fat Albert cartoon, she still wins.

Angie: Infamously talked of having sex with Billy Bob Thornton in the limo before an awards show.
Me: Famously rode in a limo once. For Reals!

Angie: Loves body art. She has several tattoos, and sports even more in her next role as a heavily tattooed assassin in ‘Wanted’, soon to be seen by millions on the big screen.
Me: Got a temporary henna tattoo in Jackson Square in New Orleans once, and the process was filmed by a German tourist. My bare midriff has likely bored tens of friends and neighbors in Deutchland forced to watch his vacation videos.

Angie: Has a seemingly solid relationship with Brad Pitt- perenially hot, a great dad, and activist himself.
Me: I have a seemingly solid relationship with my TV remote. Even though I have been suspicious that someone else is pushing it's buttons lately. *Sob* Next, please.

Angie: Kicked butt as Lara Croft in the ‘Tomb Raider’ films, seen by millions.
Me: Kicked butt on the eliptical machine this morning, alone.

Angie: U.N. Ambassador
Me: Drank the UN-Cola once.

Angie: Long, beautiful, lustrous brunette locks.
Me: Hot new bangs. Checkmate, Anj.